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My wife explained she was having an affair, were raped when more youthful, and from now on doesn’t want intercourse beside me | Sex |


I’m a wedded guy in my mid-30s. A couple of years ago my spouse informed me she was actually having an affair. I was stunned. Worried for my personal kids, we sat it out, waiting around for it to take and pass. It performed stop and that I persuaded my partner to cut contact with him and concentrate on her family members. She next unveiled that as a student she was basically raped by somebody she realized. She now tells me that she really likes me and desires stick to me but is unable of having sexual experience of myself, no less than not for the time being. She’s also suggested that we give consideration to witnessing some other females. Despite every little thing, we nonetheless love my partner and would like to improve commitment work but I feel it’ll fade whenever we can’t have the ability to get a hold of an actual physical commitment once again.

I will suggest you find lovers therapy. Additionally, individual treatment could help your spouse to recover from the woman trauma – the affair have induced thoughts of the woman experience. The persistence during her event had been wise. It’s understandable that the woman is experiencing intimately numb at this time – that is usually the beginning of the recovery process.

Take heart from the expertise that it’s fairly common for a person to withdraw from all intimate contact when they are coping with the aftermath or memories of coercive sex – that is exactly how your body and psyche shield by themselves. Show patience slightly longer, have actually trust and look for the support both of you want.




Pamela Stephenson Connolly is a clinical psychologist and psychotherapist whom specialises in treating sexual conditions.


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